HOME AND OUT OF WACK

It’s Late October, and I’m home from being on the road,, singing my songs /peddling my old fashioned wares.

Time is always out of wack after a tour. Up early today, but tired as hell.

The dog/ cats I call my family are eager to have company in our mutual awake-ness. My sweet Melissa is still asleep… steady and warm. Always miss her when away, and the reunion Is always big.

Looking through email- so much to get ON this week… and suddenly I’m aware of the loud and visual power of the train coming by. If you know me, you know I live on the train track. If you don’t know me, well… my back yard is a train yard greenway.  There is something about the sounds of a train: It is saxophone in present and  vintage history mixed.

Ollie the Chihuahua snuggles at my side and yes,  time is out of wack,. I love it…It unsettles me but it stimulates. Who cares about the boundaries society puts in place. ??? I’m up at 4a.m writing ,and that’s just the right thing.

When people die it really messes with time…suddenly you are living in your memory film, riding along  with mixed and vivid emotions. I remember being on the beach with this guy in LA, I remember a funeral, standing outside in dark, icy weather. I remember I cooked a meal for this woman, the mother of my lover. I remember the look in her lake - blue eyes when she greeted me at the door. She was amazing. Most of all in this silly life of mine, I hold onto the memories that made me feel electric, one way or another.

Sometimes it seems the reality of life is s in black and white. The past, our dreams, and our wishes for the future  are in color.  In the present it is up to us to mix this up so we are not bored, and walking the earth out of touch, and almost dead

I prefer bittersweet life- over sweet death.